On Monday 23rd of April 2018, a new royal was born. Congratulations to the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge on the birth of their new bundle of joy. Celebrating this new arrival made me remember the birth process of my own adorable daughters; I remember the process of conception till birth and that’s what I want us to talk about today.
- So first, for a baby to appear, in the crudest terms, a seed must be sown or more conventionally, you need to get pregnant.
- As the baby starts to grow and develop in the womb, it necessitates the mother to ‘obey’ some rules. These rules could include a list of don’ts as well as do’s. I remember reducing my coffee intake because of the effect coffee had on me, and even being warned to reduce my excessive barbeque obsession. My list of do’s included regular multivitamins etc.
- To ensure the baby is growing as expected, most pregnant women go for regular antenatal check-ups. This is where the baby’s growth is monitored and assurance is given to the mum that all will be well
- And when all this is done, you await the due date. This is characterised by pain and gain, despair and excitement, tears and joy because you see, because the baby comes and you get that bundle of joy that you have nurtured in secret for 9 months, before the newest representation of you is revealed to the world, you MUST experience the birthing period… it is the same with plants as well – science tells us that there is a “dying” process before the seed comes alive and burst through the soil.
So we have conception – control – check-up – completion, 4 ‘C’s I demonstrate as the necessity of ideas that become reality. Let’s take a look at our lives and begin with the question, “What do you want to birth before the end of 2018? What are your unique qualities that the world needs to see and celebrate with you?” I know you most likely started the year with goals and you might be working hard to achieve them, but think for a minute – “What is the end result of my goal? What am I bringing to the world? Let me make it a little more explanatory. I am currently working on 2 new books – one to be released in June and the second in December. To be honest, this has been really challenging, considering my academic, familial and business commitments. However, deep down, I know that there is someone out there who needs the knowledge in my head and that I need to document it in book form. Therefore, the desire to give that little bit of me to my world, is the motivation for waking up between 2 and 5am daily to research and write.
I love to teach, so let’s go back to my 4 ‘C’s and show you how this is working… so first ‘C’ is Conception, which in this case is the notion that “Doyin, you have systems, behaviour patterns etc. which you take for granted, but have unknowingly helped you excel and you need to share these with your world”. The idea is the seed I have and the book(s) will be my fruit.
Now to the next ‘C’, Control. I use this world in relation to the controlled environment that scientists work in to ensure the results of their experiment can have validity and reliability. A controlled environment is necessitated by rules, boundaries etc. If you’re like me, you hated the sound of that word ‘rules’ as soon as I mentioned it. I wish I could tell you that to move from idea to realisation, you could do whatever you want, however, that would be totally untrue. You are going to have to let go of certain habits, as well as gain new ones. You might have to sleep less, watch less TV, cut down your social engagements while at the same time, become an avid reader, better organised. A combination of what you stop doing and what you start doing is the fine tuning that helps you realise your ideas. In my case, I had to cut down on sleep and I had to commit to a minimum of 1hour of research and writing 4 days in the week. The practise of doing this is what is making my idea become real.
The third ‘C’ is Check-Up. Like the pregnant woman who regularly attends antenatal clinic, you also need to have a process of revisiting your idea and checking that you are still on track. You might consider having a coach or mentor alongside you, as they are equipped to measure your idea against your current position. My question to you is where do you go to have a check-up and more importantly, who does your check-up for you?
And the last C is Completion. As I said earlier, this is the place of extremes – the cry of the mother resulting from extreme pain and the cry of the new-born that signifies life and is the first tangible reality of the dream realised! If I try to describe these extremes, we could be here all day. What I must say though, is that it is guaranteed to be the most painful time in the whole process. The expressions “the darkest hour is before dawn”, or “no pain, no gain”, capture this well. All through the process of pain, you will be comforted by the words “PUSH, PUSH, almost there” and the urging on by someone who has experienced this birthing over and over again. In line with my example of my current goal and books, I remember every time I got an email from my editor – I would think “Corrections, - not again!”, particularly in that final week. But I persisted, I kept responding to the suggestions and aligning, making changes until I got the email saying “We are good to go”. Like a new baby born, I forgot the lengthy periods of ‘stress’ and just enjoyed seeing my book and reading my thoughts in print.
So my dear friend, when you are done listening to me, I would love you to ask yourself “What am I bringing to the world by December 2018?” You definitely have something special inside of you and the world is waiting to enjoy your idea. Remember that as you conceive the idea, you must be aware of and respond to the Control and Check-ups to ensure you reach completion.
I would like to invite you to this year’s MAP workshop. Our theme is “Maximise Me” and we will be working to help identify and clarify the unique strengths that you have as well as show you how to maximise them. As a treat, in our “Adorn” session this year, we will have an elocution workshop. Spaces are VERY limited so visit doyin.co.uk/the-map-workshop or map2018.eventbrite.com. I look forward to seeing you!